Welcome

Today I spent the day with our newest little blessing...Zach. I looked into his eyes as I held him in my arms and thought of my mom. My mom tried to hold out until Zach was born but she couldn't make it. Love does that. It tries to do what is best for someone else. Even if it means suffering. She knew her time to go home was getting closer and she told us she was sorry but she didn't think she would make it to Zach's birth. It breaks my heart to remember those last days. I can still see her. I can still hear her call me.."Bevie." That was her name for me. I don't think she ever called me Beverly. (Well maybe when she was mad at me.) To know I will never hear her call my name again is like she took a part of me with her. A very real part. No matter how old I was I always felt like her little girl. That little girl, died with her that day.
I believe we leave fingerprints on those we love. Unique small parts of yourself on others. Not visible to the eye but none the less there. My mother left her prints on me. It is funny how I seem to only dwell on the good things. I am so thankful for this. I can only hope that this will be the same for those I have been given to love in this life time. I hope they will remember what we shared. Losing someone as special as my mom has changed me. I think it was her final gift to me. She has made me realize how short life is. She has made to see what a waste of time so much of what I do or think about is.
My mom died in our arms. We each said our good-byes in our own way. Although she could not talk or see she made expressions that let us know she heard and she felt our presence.
She loved when I kissed her. It would hurt her if I didn't. The last few moments I had with her I kissed her all over her face. I saw one tear drop fall from her eye. I knew she felt my love as I felt hers. What a gift I was given. What a memory that I will always cherish. She entered heaven with my kisses on her face. She left this earth feeling loved to entered the ultimate place of love.
I believe that the people in our lives are there by design. God needs us to love them for Him. He needs them to love us for Him. My mom taught me that love does not have to be perfect just genuine. We know when someone is being real or not.
I also believe that not everyone is going to love us. No matter how hard we try. They are just here in our lives to pass though and to help us to realize who does love us. It's sometime hard to accept that fact but it is a fact. I am so glad that I realize it, it's not meant to damage or change you...it just is. Learn what you can and let it go. After all how much love can we take and give. That's for heaven. That's what we are looking forward to. That is God's promise to us. That's where my mom is now and when I get there I'll hear her say "Bevie" again. I just know she will.